The events in Paris had me very rattled. The elevation of hate in our world is pointing to a very odd, disturbing trend. It feels like we’re at war with ourselves. Call it terrorism, call it police brutality, call it genocide, call it whatever you want but.
We’re at war with each other. And damn is that sad.
Religion is a funny thing. It creates a barrier between people. In the search for enlightenment and faith and community, it alienates people from those with different beliefs. There’s a whole “we are right and they are wrong” mentality that has caused countless deaths and endless hatred.
I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and while I still believe everything, I struggle with organized religion. It’s sometimes suffocating. I have my own private relationship with God, that I don’t feel that I need to share. People overshare and push their beliefs onto other people and I think that’s kind of shitty. God should be the only one that judges.
Yesterday I was running around my neighborhood in broad daylight when a homeless man reached out and slapped my arm. He did it intentionally because when I screamed at him he just laughed and walked away. He knew I was trying to get around him so he decided to scare me just because. I am SO sick of people making feel unsafe. I am tired of being small and weak and unable to defend myself. I am tired, most of all, of people thinking they can put their fucking hands on me.
This world is unkind to women.
Becoming socially aware can be a burden sometimes. Some days I just want to ignore the sexist, racist, creepy shit that happens around me, but I can’t. Because that’s not who I am anymore. I need to figure out a good way to approach certain things because being standoffish and mildly rude isn’t sustainable haha. Help meeeeee. Does anyone work or live in a place where they experience things like this? Or know people that are blatantly disrespectful and insensitive? I need advice on how to deal.
I hate the notion of being “girly”. What does that even mean? Being the stereotypical girl who likes pink and floral prints and bows and heels? I reject the idea of that being girly anymore. Sometimes I like to wear bows and polka dots and all my accessories are pink because pink is my favorite color. But black and gray are mostly what I wear on a daily basis. I would say my normal look is a tomboy-modern punk fusion. I love leather and gold and boots and tattoo tights and bulky sweaters and flannel. I like mixing what society calls “girly” with an edge. Crop tops and flannels. Combat boots with mini skirts. It’s not anything new, but it is me.
In the last couple of years I’ve really found myself and my personal style. For awhile I couldn’t really figure it out. But I think as I get older I’m more and more assured as to who I am. And what I want for that matter. It’s a pretty good feeling.
Those who willfully choose to ignore the world around them are infinitely shitty people. To ignore the plights of others reveals your privilege. Why wouldn’t you use your status in life to help other people? Instead of telling the unprivileged that their stories, their lives, their opinions, their truths are wrong. Because here’s the reality: they’re right. We live in a country where the minority is silenced and murdered in the streets, where women can be beaten and raped and it’s excused under “boys will be boys.” REJECT THIS IDEA. Stop feeding into hatred by ignoring what’s happening around you.
Last night was super emotional for me. Darren Wilson didn’t get indicted for murdering a kid. That’s the America we live in. Where a cop can shoot someone six times because they “looked like a demon” and not get any kind of punishment for it. I hope Mike Brown’s parents file a civil lawsuit against Wilson. He’s a piece of shit who decided in 60 seconds to end someone’s life. UGH I am still so mad.
It really bothers me how ignorant people can be. Saw something on Facebook, a kid posted about Muslims in the military being allowed to wear their turbans because its a part of their religion and he basically said they need to go back to their country and blah blah blah. So incredibly vile. I can’t believe people my age think like this. Like I thought we were the enlightened ones? We’re the ones that grew up with unlimited access to the internet. We’re the ones that had friends across the world just through one click. We’re the ones who are constantly consuming information and we’re skeptical about the things that are put in front of us, so we always research. We’re the ones who laugh at the older generations for how uninformed and old school they are. So anyone my age who can be that ignorant is choosing to be an asshole. There’s no excuse for that when we’re young. And grew up in this diverse country. UGH.